You may think it’s more important to tend constantly to the needs of other people rather than yourself. This appears at first glance to be the selfless, even saintly, way to behave. Aren’t mothers supposed to put the needs of their family first?
The truth of the matter is that you will be more “response-able” to the needs of your family by protecting the bit of space you need to refill. The only real alternative is to run out of energy and your ability to respond after being on call 24/7. It may take a while, but a crash will happen eventually unless you take positive action now.
You undoubtedly want the best for your children, and may mistakenly think the best for them means putting all your feelings and needs on the back burners. But what about the fact that you are one of their more important role models from the first day they arrive in your life? If you don’t take care of yourself, your children will learn from your actions (or lack thereof) more than your words. Show them how to take care of themselves by making healthy choices for yourself.
Yes, meditation is proven to be a highly effective tool for reducing stress and increasing health, but there are thousands of other ways to take ten minutes for you. The important thing is to make a commitment to yourself and follow through with it daily. You could go for a walk, listen to some favorite music, take a bath, sit in the car (as long as you’re not driving!), look at a beautiful painting or view, or savor a cup of coffee or tea all by yourself.
If you are a stay-at-home mom who is normally with your child (or children) 24 hours a day, I encourage you to find a creative way to take an hour or two away at least once a week while your baby is being properly cared for by another adult. This will allow you some mental and physical decompression time. It’s amazing how much more you can appreciate the miracle of life that you helped create when you have a small amount of space that other people take for granted. Just being away for a short time can open you up to wholeheartedly enjoying your family even if you thought you were too tired to do so.
When your inner self begins to realize that you are consistently taking a little bit of time and space for yourself, you are likely to find your overall mood and body image improving. There is something extraordinarily healing about saying that it is O.K. to take up some room in the world, that it is O.K. to be. This simple act can create a positive upward spiral into a healthier sense of well-being. Therefore, taking time for yourself is a proactive way to become a healthier, better adjusted, more response-able human being, mother and partner.